I am sitting here at BlogWorld Expo with Chris Brogan, Liz Strauss and Chris Heuer. We’re goin’ over our “friending” policies. These guys are so cool and all great examples of my theory: Friend and Let Friend! Let me ‘splain…
First off – I believe in friends. I like friends, I am a social person. Always have been (my third grade teacher said: “Stephanie is a Social Butterfly!) Online social networking is a natural fit for me. Much has been written about what is appropriate behavior on Facebook and other social networks with regards to friending. The bottom line is – this is one area of social media that YOU CONTROL.
Everyone has a right to define their own level of comfort with regard to friend lists. Do not assume that everyone operates under the same rules. And don’t assume that the rules apply equally to every social network (my Facebook “policies” are quite different than my Flickr rules).
For me, my Facebook list is a marketing list. I seek to keep it very business / cool person focused. I review work history, and mutual connections. I must say, lately, perhaps a few others have gotten in. I will do a purge if necessary, and especially will purge anyone I think is acting inappropriately (meaning not cool). You need to create your own criteria for what works for you.
Someone recently contacted me and said that someone that was my friend, asked to friend her (she accepted) and then he friended her sister. OK – for me, that’s weird. But for others it may not be. I will tell you that I respond to any inquiries regarding inappropriate behavior. I take it seriously, and I will take action! In general – here’s what matters most to me:
#1 You must include your picture and your work history. It is very unlikely I will friend you without this, unless you are my sister.
Also – If you made it through without either of these, I will be purging soon.
#2 I care about who we have in common. The more the merrier.
#3 If I reach out to you, it’s because I am seeking business synergy or general good karma. If I am reaching out to you for “friendship” – It is because we have someone in common and I think there is a BUSINESS reason for us to be on each other’s networks. Or I want you on my network so I can invite you to events and cool things that you will want to be invited to. If you don’t use Facebook that way – no problem. My intentions are always focused on value.
But what’s right for me is not necessarily right for you. Live and let live.. friend and let friend! You are in control!
